15 Things I Took For Granted Before Becoming A Parent
The kid is a tiny tornado! He never stops going. On the days the little tornado reaches F5 status, I can't help but think about how much I miss the time when...
- ...the back seat of my car didn't look like a child snack buffet exploded on it.
- ...leaving the house in less than five minutes was actually doable.
- ...I had regular play dates with MY friends.
- ...I didn't wonder every time I pick up my tooth brush if it's been used to clean a Hot Wheel
- ...I could eat cookies, candy or chocolate without having to hide it from a candy crazy little person.
- ...I didn't need to do the dishes and laundry every day or face mountains of both.
- ...I could shower without having a child talk to me the entire time.
- ...Professor (my 12yr old cat) was not constantly pissed off.
- ...I bought heels instead of "shoes I can catch a toddler in." I've actually said that to a shoe department attendant.
- ...EVERY window in my house didn't have tiny fingerprints on them.
- ...my house wasn't covered in tiny toddler land mines.
- ...Porn randomly played in the background throughout the day. (Sorry, couldn't help myself.)
- ...I could say totally inappropriate shit whenever I felt like it. (See #12)
- ...I didn't need an excuse to go to Target alone... for hours.
What drives you crazy enough to miss the ease of your childless days?