Jan 5, 2012

Observations at 35 weeks Pregnant

  1. I am so incredibly tired! It’s amazing that I can even type this because even my fingers are begging for a nap.
  2. One day my baby is poking, pushing and kicking in my belly, the next I am Googing,”35 weeks pregnant, baby not moving as much. Is everything ok?” I continuously flip and flop between, “Is he ok in there?” to ”ooh look at him move!” FYI: I have learned that on the days I worry, I drink a large glass of ice water, have a small snack then go lay down on my left side and be silent. I envision him moving around and within minutes I can feel him. I turn on my kick counter Smart Phone “app,” and inevitably feel my 10 kicks in less than 30 minutes and Viola! my heart is at ease. Plus I have just scored 30 minutes of peace, quiet and baby bonding time!
  3. I can no longer sit in a hard chair, if it doesn’t have padding, it doesn’t have my booty sitting in it. Within 5 minutes I am so uncomfortable, my tailbone is drilling a hole in the chair and then it is so painfully difficult to get up. I would rather stand!
  4. I LOVE washing my baby’s clothes and folding them… then unfolding them… then reorganizing them… then smelling them... then envisioning him in them. Sometimes I even hug them! I don’t care if you think I am a freak… I know I am, so whatever! ; P
  5. I eat stool softeners and Tums like they are candy. Trust me without them… this list would be much different and filled with potty words and anger.
  6. I take a warm bath EVERYDAY! It is the only time of day I feel light, at ease and for the most part without pain. Thank you buoyancy for making my pregnancy easier, because we all know gravity has not!
  7. I can only sleep on my left side, with a pillow between my legs, one tucked behind my back, one under my belly and then the one for my head. Once in this position I will not get up for shit! Well except in two hours when I have to pee… and yes I do repack myself every time, otherwise I CANNOT get back to sleep.
  8. My hips, pelvis and tailbone are clearly not meant to hold up my big boy, because they are constantly shouting out in pain!
  9. I spent the first 32 years of my life not pregnant, but for the life of me I cannot seem to remember what it’s like. I waddle and wonder what it’s like to walk. I slowly haul my huge ass up the stairs, and wonder what it’s like to skip a few on the way up. I go to the bathroom and wonder what it’s like to not be afraid of hemorrhoids. I tell you this much though… I cannot friggin wait until I get back to those pre pregnancy glory days!
  10. I finally stopped trying to squeeze my big ass and belly into a regular bathroom stall. I have decided that the “handicap” stall also means pregnancy. In fact I want to write on each sign under Handicap, "PREGNANCY” so all pregnant women will finally stop hitting their belly or butts with the regular bathroom stall door… I do it every time…or have to straddle the toilet leaning over to get the door closed… admit it so do you!
  11. I cannot wait to pee like a champion racehorse, only a couple times a day… I have to say the most inconvenient thing about pregnancy is the frequent trips to the Loo… I have spent more time in there than ANYWHERE else. I have also peed in Loos I never in my life thought I would, in neighborhoods I never thought I would stop in, but dammit when you are pregnant and you gotta go… you REALLY gotta go.
  12. I worry everyday about how my husband and I are going to be at parenting. Are we going to be good together? Butt heads and fight all of the time? He was raised half Austrian/half Australian, I was raised 100% American… we are such different people for it. Opposites attract but do opposites make good parents? Oi!
  13. We never did ONE parenting class… I am wondering now if it was a mistake? But, if you knew my husband you would know why. I cringe at the thought… He has absolutely no filter and by all accounts lives to embarrass me. In a birthing class, I know he would yell out, “EFF me!”, then start gagging and crying. In a breastfeeding class, he would scream out “Bloody Hell! Look at the nipples, what’s just happened?” Thankfully we have YouTube…
  14. Some days I start to freak out about feeling tied down by having a baby, then I remember babies are resilient and fly for free the first two years of their lives… My baby is not a boat anchor he is a pass to the front of the airport security line! I know I am awful. But at least I’m honest too!
  15. Some days I can eat all day, I mean 8-9 small meals and still am starving in between. Then the next day I will eat one big meal and that's it. There is still no rhyme or reason to my diet and nutrition. It’s really annoying. Just this morning I ordered a huge breakfast, and then when if finally got to the table the sight turned my stomach so I ate toast. Boooooo!
  16. I am starting to get really anxious about my C-section and delivery. I don't care if EVERYONE tells me not to worry (which they do!) I'm still scared to have my tummy cut open and have my baby pulled out. I am worried about recovery and the pain. I wish it was a fast easy process... but pregnancy is anything but, why would my delivery be?
  17. One minute I think, “Yay I only have 4 more weeks left of being pregnant!” and the next I think, “Oh Shit in 4 weeks I will be a clueless mother with an infant baby!” I’m going to be that crazy chick in delivery saying, “Take him out!, no wait leave him in!... No I hate pregnancy, take him out… No Wait… My doctor would no doubt knock me out then write me a prescription for Mental Meds…
  18. I may need the mental meds anyway, because I am SO incredibly scared to be a mom! I am so scared to be opening this next MAJOR chapter of my life! I just keep telling myself that everyone says it will be the very best chapter of my life, and to just wait… Eff me I hope they are right!
  19. I can still honestly say there is absolutely nothing about pregnancy I will miss. I have not enjoyed much and what I have enjoyed, is always short lived. I am even sick of kicks and hiccups already. It is just hell on my body, emotions and relationships. I wish it were different, but it’s not and that is that!
  20. Still at the end of the day, I lay my head on my pillow and I fall asleep with a smile on my face thinking about how I CANNOT wait to fill all of those cute little baby clothes with my cute little baby! So yes… it has all been worth it.

Two confused parents=One amused baby Hopelessly we are trying raise a baby who is clearly smarter than both of us. April is an award-winning writer and blogger. Her work has been published in over ten countries and four languages. From books to newspapers, to print/online magazines and everything in between, you can find her work. For more on April, Visit AprilMcCormick.com


  1. Oh, sweetie. I've had a csection that was a BREEZE with nearly zero recovery time and I'm terrified and anxious about my next one. I'm not sure if I'll be worse or better than my first one, where I had a panic attack as they strapped me to an IV. I mean, they had to give me oxygen and my husband was basically forcing me to sign the consent forms as I cried to them that I didn't want to have the baby. I flipped out and weeped right through everything until the spinal took effect and they had to strap my hands down!

    Once they started cutting though and I realized I didn't feel a thing, I started to zonk out. No lie, I nearly fell asleep right after they took my baby to the nursery. They actually encouraged me to sleep since I had stressed myself out so badly. And the recovery was a breeze. Recovery from a csection when you don't labor is actually pretty easy from what I hear.

  2. Thanks Kitten. I'm am a total basket case about it all these days... Make that number 21 on my list. ;)

  3. I love this post! I bought my first baby clothes item last week. Just a simple footed onesie that was very soft. When I pulled it out of the dryer my eyes welled up and I hugged it for a solid 60 seconds followed by the thought, "if anyone saw me they would think I was a freak." lol

    BTW...I think your going to be a great mom! :)

  4. Thank you FTM@27! I'm totally going to hug a onesie right now! And you are going to be great too! Xx

  5. It's so funny to read these and relate to so many of them! This is my second baby and I think I'm freaking out more this time than last!! Like you I'm so worried about my csection.. I don't know why because my 1st one was a breeze! My first daughter was such a good baby and yet I'm freaking out about actually bringing another one home! I see people in the stores with they're cute little babies and I go into a full on panic attack!! Lol my husband thinks I'm nuts!

  6. I have to tell you, I'm also 33 and 32 weeks pregnant with my first. On top of that, my husband and I are the first of our friends to have a baby, so we're soooo clueless! For 32 weeks I've felt every emotion under the sun and no book or website has really made me feel better about everything tha t is going on. Two nights ago, when I couldn't sleep...again, I typed in "tired of being pregnant" into google WOW! It was like magic finding your blog! I've read through quick a few of your posts, and they all hit home!!! THANK YOU!!!!!!! Please keep posting after the baby is born! Something tells me your thoughts on mothering would be helpful to many!

  7. Thank you SO much! Your comment makes it all worth it on the nights I'd rather cry then write. And good news... My husband and I bought the rights to www.firsttimemomanddad.com we will be posting through our childrens college days probably! All the very best to you and your family! Xx

  8. I'm a FTM and 29 wks and I don't think I can work anymore I'm so exhausted. But I need the medical benefits so I've got to hang in there...

  9. I wish I can have my babies without being pregnant. I am not fortunate to enjoy pregnancy at alllllllllll.