Dec 16, 2011

Life is a journey and growing one is too.

My girlfriend (also pregnant) and I were laughing the other day about the All-Time top five Internet search phrases that land people on my they are in order...

1. I'm (So) tired of being pregnant
2.I hate being pregnant
3. I'm pregnant and I hate my husband
4. Pregnant cramping, stretching, pulling at 13 weeks
5. Craving so much milk while pregnant

We were laughing because judging by those top search terms, I have clearly been writing some great and inspiring stories about pregnancy. I suppose it’s a bit funny that in my 33 years of living, my only claim to fame so far is bitching about my pregnancy. I looked at her and said, “So what if I want to bitch about my less than fairytale pregnancy?” She looked at me and said, “well I guess nothing… it’s not like its hurting anyone, especially you or your baby.” I told her that I thought it was actually helping us, because sometimes I sit down to write a Blog and I am so frustrated or am in the middle of a hormonal cry, but by the end I am laughing at the atrocity I have to sometimes call my pregnancy.

Somewhere along the way we have been programmed to believe we should be so ashamed if we do not love and embrace every shitty bit of our pregnancy. Yeah, well whatever! I have also been programmed to say and do what I want thanks to being born in an age where women have a voice and are allowed to use it. What's the saying, "Well behaved women rarely make history."

I think so far I have embraced every aspect of my pregnancy and been very truthful with myself, and maybe the world too, about how it has felt or affected me. I should think being honest about your own pregnancy is a hell of a lot better than “putting up and shutting up.” For some of us pregnancy sucks Donkey Dong, for others not so much. But why do we have to act like it’s the most wonderful 10 months of our lives when it’s anything but?

I am living proof that Pregnancy is a huge rollercoaster of pain, emotions and personal growth. My first trimester was a shit sandwich of every possible crappy side effect of pregnancy! My second trimester was a nice escape from those first trimester side effects, but it was also a time for personal growth. I spent that time accepting that I was going to really become a mother. I had passed the 20-week danger zone and according to my doctor my baby (boy) was very healthy and growing like a champ. I really began to face my fears about being a mother and what effect it would have on my life moving forward. I also realized I needed to grow up, drop off some baggage and make the necessary changes to be the best damn mom I could possibly be.

Finally, deep into my third trimester, I have settled into pregnancy. I have also begun to fall in love with my baby like I couldn’t imagine. It brings tears to my eyes just talking about him. Now that I can actually see him rolling around in there… I just cannot describe how it makes me feel. I have even started to notice his sleep patterns and the difference between his playtime and hiccups. I already have this sense of protection for him and want to provide for him and love him like there is absolutely nothing else in this world that I have to do. He is a true blessing to me, the greatest gift I have ever been given, and I already love him very much.

I have had the craziest 8 months of my life so far, and from what I hear I have no idea how crazy it is really going to get. I don’t think I will ever say that as a whole I love being pregnant, but I have more than realized that it all has been way more than worth it. Life is a journey and without a doubt growing one is too.

Two confused parents=One amused baby Hopelessly we are trying raise a baby who is clearly smarter than both of us. April is an award-winning writer and blogger. Her work has been published in over ten countries and four languages. From books to newspapers, to print/online magazines and everything in between, you can find her work. For more on April, Visit


  1. Yeah, I found you with the stretching at 13 weeks. Your blog cracks me up and so far I can totally relate to your earliest posts (I'm only 14.5 weeks now). This pregnancy was a total surprise - I am the 1% of those that when taken correctly the pill still fails. I have hated every bit of pregnancy so far, and while I lucked out and never vomited during the first tri, I was exhausted and horribly nauseous and still haven't really made friends with food. Yay for being down 5lbs... wait, losing weight is frowned upon while pregnant? Damn!
    It's reassuring to know that I'm not the only one feeling guilty for not loving it as so many of my friends with children claim they loved it. I've decided they're either liars or have forgotten how awful it was.

  2. Hpets80-- two things

    1. Your friends are probably suffering from "pregnancy amnesia" it's very real...
    2. I really does get better. Around 20 weeks the universe kind of starts to make sense again.

    Some days I do feel like I'm standing in the center of the earth and it spinning around me so fast I can't move, but the more he moves and we bond, the more the earth slows down. I promise you, when it comes to pregnancy, This too shall pass...

    All ther very best to you!! X