Oct 6, 2011

My Body is Eating My Underpants!

I mentioned to my lfriend that I rarely, if ever, look in the mirror at my bump. I admit it really kind of freaks me out, and I am not sure why. Plus, I really only see my growing thighs, butt and breast staring back at me. At 5 1/2 months I know I am being silly, but I cannot help it. Well, my bff, pregnant as well, told me to go home and try to just look at my bump, she promised it will be amazing. I gave it my best shot and failed. All I saw was my knickers being eaten up by my belly and thighs!

First of all, I gave up thong panties in my late twenties, really because I was tired of constantly having them up my ass. Secondly, I recently had to purchase an entire new drawer full of large “granny” panties, because my butt and thighs, somewhere between month four and five, devoured my sexy underpants . Now, all of the sudden my, highly recommended super comfortable, grannies are disappearing as well. They were the size of my head when they went on and somehow the reflection in the mirror shows a small G-String like pink line of cloth. WTF!!!

I do want to share with you all that recently I did some more “pregnancy weight gain” research and came across a very interesting article about the truth of weight gain in 2010. I am sure like me you as well are so tired of hearing women say they did not show until 6+ months or only gained 18 pounds. Well, finally I can share with you an acceptable reason why! The baby boomers gave birth in their late teens early twenties when their metabolism was fantastic. The trend over the last twenty years has been that women are waiting MUCH later, mid to late thirties and forties is becoming the norm now. I think we all can agree the turn of the thirties also brings the turn of the metabolism dial down to ZERO! The new weight gain averages in women over 30 is 50-60 pounds. All of my girlfriends who waited until their thirties/forties to get pregnant said the same, 40-80 pounds.

I will look for the source of this and post it to the bottom when/if I find it again but I bet you could really just talk to your doctor about these new averages. My doctor admitted that she gained 60 pounds with each child and she started the same age as me, 33. It does make me feel better about possibly/definitely going over my “25 pound average” but it is still hard to look in the mirror and see my body growing ALL OVER! My belly may have even been the last to get the pregnancy weight gain memo, but I can clearly tell it is making up for it each week now!

Also, here is my big screw up of the day... I was standing in line to get my half regular/half decaf latte this morning when I saw the girl in front of me had a big baby bump too. I asked her when she was due and she told me she DELIVERED FOUR MONTHS AGO! Oh, crap, with no possible chance for a recovery I just said, “ Oh! Congratulations!” She then proceeded to tell me how I should not be fooled into thinking the bump goes away any time soon after childbirth. SHIT!! Back to the drawing board of trying to work hard to limit excess weight gain as much as possible, because if I am going to look like I am pregnant until a year or two after popping out babies, I might as well invest heavily in great maternity clothes and donate my entire closet of “normal” clothes now, in addition to smashing all of the mirrors in my house!

This is one of those times I have to take a big deep breath and remind myself with a little bit of discipline and hard work this, pregnancy weight gain, too shall pass.

Two confused parents=One amused baby Hopelessly we are trying raise a baby who is clearly smarter than both of us. April is an award-winning writer and blogger. Her work has been published in over ten countries and four languages. From books to newspapers, to print/online magazines and everything in between, you can find her work. For more on April, Visit AprilMcCormick.com

1 comment:

  1. I am still watching my sister after 8 months lose the baby weight everywhere but her belly. I never understood why she didn't want to rock her maternity wear till she lost the weight. But now I know that you cannot wear real shirts with maternity pants and then people will think you are still preggers. And those pants are annoying, I am constantly fooling with the lycra, pulling it up. On another note, one of my pairs of maternity underwear is already falling apart (worn and washed maybe 6 times)and I've only been wearing maternity underwear when I'm not in pajama pants. I got the really large Granny briefs and so far no ass eating.

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