Aug 1, 2011

HELP, My Pregnant Butt Just Hit The Floor

Over the last week or so I have come to realize that 90% of the clothes in my closet are not going to fit anytime soon. Before I packed everything into storage I tried on a few of the larger pieces just in case.  Only two pairs of pants were even capable of the climb past my thighs and over my fat butt.  I nearly started crying tears of joy when I got a pair of jeans up and buttoned. Then I turned around and saw that my ass is heading south and fast.  I don't get it, I'm only 13 weeks, it’s awful. My butt is a big fat flat flabby droopy mess.  I HATE BEING PREGNANT!!!

Seriously, why are my butt and thighs being brought into this?  The war is in my belly and that's where it should stay! I know things are only going to get worse from here but I don't have to be ok with it just yet!  Let me just warn you before you keep reading I am about to throw one hell of a pity party...

It's so hard to have control over my diet and exercise when I feel so out of control to begin with!  It's so difficult right now to gain control between the nausea and hot summer days.  I even woke up this morning with great intentions to eat well and finally give prenatal yoga a shot since walking outside is not an option.  So far I have eaten crap and sat on my fat butt. I have been eating a lot of fruits and salads but also HEAPS of carbs. (Hence the mass of cellulite that has taken over)

I've been reading books and articles that say, "if you're gonna get fat during pregnancy there is nothing you can do about it."  I have a sales job and my appearance is a part of my job. It also doesn't help that I work with twenty something’s who put so much stock in their weight and looks (which I did too in my--always) and here I am growing uncontrollably.  Yes, I know I am pregnant but I feel like crap and my hormones are weighing as much as my ass right now.

I'm going to keep a food and exercise journal for two weeks.  Then take it to my doctor and see how it compares to my health and weight gain. Stay tuned I am going gain to control come hell or high water dammit! Or, if I cannot I will at least know I tried.  My doctor, who is in great shape after 4 children, told me she gained 60 pounds with each pregnancy while her sister only gained 13 pounds.  For some reason I keep going back to that to find my solace in all of this... I can & will bounce back too.

I wish there was a magical pill that I could take to stop caring so much.  This baby is number one and my ass will have to be number two, but where does my pride fit in?

Two confused parents=One amused baby Hopelessly we are trying raise a baby who is clearly smarter than both of us. April is an award-winning writer and blogger. Her work has been published in over ten countries and four languages. From books to newspapers, to print/online magazines and everything in between, you can find her work. For more on April, Visit